Life tests is so many ways , its qute easy to loose hope, troubled , whats the point of all these farce, people, society, God.At times I wondered, why should I be good, why should I care for someone but no matter what something told me to carry on, No matter how negative the thoughts, the circumstances are, faith somehow survives. I have sometimes prayed, pleaded to show me that you dont exist, let me be aware of the truth, let me know that I am in dark, let me not fool myself, but then somehow I found the courage, the hope. How could I deny your existence, whenever I searched for you I found a certain calmness, as if you are saying "why are you so worried ?", yet the next moment I would have doubts, is it just an illusion, a self fulfilling story.
Then there are those moments, out of nowhere you are aware, that just wipes out all the dark thoughts. Why should there be a conflict, why are you putting yourself into a corner, the light is all around, you just dont see it. Life is such a beautiful thing experience it, your negative thoughts are cause of your perspective, your conflicts are of your making. Embrace this life for the pure bliss of being.
ANd then you are so calm, tolerant, things that you dont like dont trouble you any more, they are like that. Everyone of Gods creation is in pursuit of that bliss of being on this earth, in their own ways, like me , like one of us. Their means are different, they have different plan but the goal is same, Each one trying to enjoy the pure joy of being, Then you see the beauty in the variance not the conflict. Still there will be incidents that challenges this knew perspective, it will be tested all right but as long as this belief remains as long as I am aware of my being, I think I can enjoy the pure delight of being.
I just hope I can do justice to this life, that will be my prayer to you, that would delight you, I hope, I believe.
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